I’ve seen so many go under the knife for a chance at a better life that I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s just not worth it. I am 54 years old, so I can see the effects of time on my face and body, but they do not stop my ability to create, write or love. All three give invaluable value and meaning to my life.
Almost every time I’ve nursed a girlfriend through the experience, I had a dark side. The pain, swelling, bruising, medications, and a “time off” from life activities were enough to deal with. But almost always, during the healing process, the recipient regrets having to surgically alter her body in order to feel good or acceptable in her world.
Liposuction has caused depression in everyone I know who has been through it. I always thought that the body mourns the loss of a part of itself, including fat. The weight and the impossible figures became a plague in our society that lasts until today.
Here in Nacogdoches (the oldest city in Texas), I have enjoyed seeing women in town when I go for supplies that are naturally aging. It is not offensive. It is life on life’s terms, literally. It is a softening of features. Plastic surgery changes the features completely.
There are a few times that I felt that surgically altering someone was a blessing. Protruding ears look ridiculous and almost impossible to cover. I have met two men who have had it done and the results have been wonderful. They seemed normal, not enhanced.
At 54, I can see where the Botox would go on my face. I have also seen why women have collagen in their lips and ‘eye work’. But, I am not offended by the aging of my face. My age doesn’t bother me. And, my world is blossoming and opening up more every day. I am in love with my life, so improving my physical appearance will not improve my experience.
Self-image obsession is like a disease. It distorts a person’s view of the world into a very small version by focusing on something as small as lips or a lump here or there. Thousands of dollars are spent removing lines or filling small areas. Most of the women I know who underwent age-reducing treatments were not happier or calmer afterward. Most tended to shift their focus to a different area to change.
Weight is all up for discussion, but California is at a high threat level. Job opportunities, social commitments, and public/private recognition become limited as body weight increases. It’s not pretty, but I’ve noticed it many times in my 25 years on the West Coast.
Texas women might have some room to improve. The people of California could take the focus further back on the externals. A mixture of both worlds could be wonderful. One should be proud of one’s personal appearance but not obsessed. Going into town in ill-fitting, stained and tattered clothes, in slippers with your hair pulled back and cut on top is a tired sight here in deep East Texas. Octogenarians with perky large breasts and taut faces with oddly high hairlines are equally uninspiring.
It’s about balance. Always has been. It will always be.
