Twelve tips to help exhausted toddlers repair their mental muscles

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Self-discipline is a well-developed skill in most adults and important to the survival of our society. Those who grow up with little self-discipline may be ostracized by others or fall victim to vices like drugs and alcohol. Self-discipline is a required ingredient of successful professions like business, athletics, and medicine. Even the business of art, music, and theater requires great self-discipline on the part of those who may have tendencies toward unbridled freedom. However, no one has more need for self-control for their own protection than a young child. However, toddlers are pure energy with few brakes and fewer breaks. The maturation process is slow and difficult. Here are twelve tips to help you be a better parent as your child learns self-control.

1. Think of self-discipline as mental muscle.

A successful and in-control person has well-developed mental muscle. If properly cared for, the muscle will provide performance for a lifetime. The expert bodybuilder takes care of the precious muscles that get tired with rest, elevation, protection from further injury, care for your health and your body, information about what is wrong with you and massage until a complete recovery brings the muscle back. to be useful.

2. Reduce your demands.

Would you agree that even the strongest muscle can become weak and tired from overuse? An extraordinary effort can exhaust the most powerful strongman. A wise person would not insist that an exhausted muscle must continue regardless of the pain suffered. Demanding injuries and spasms can occur if one ignores the increasing pain of the tired muscle. Tantrums are the result of inadequate coping skills and too much demand.

3. Nobody is perfect.

Even an adult who is productive and self-disciplined has moments of weakness and can succumb to bad behavior, such as eating an entire cake, fighting, or foolishly spending rent money. The more stressed, depressed, or tired a person is, the more likely their self-discipline mental muscle will fail.

4. Remember how much progress you have already made.

A baby has no self-discipline at first, crying and wetting at will. Slowly, over the next several years, the child’s experiences and maturity help the muscles of self-discipline to strengthen. A child may not fully develop emotionally until their twenties. You have a long way to go.

5. He learned it from you.

The behavior you applaud, as well as the behavior you want to avoid, comes primarily from watching their parents. If you give him love bites in the game, he will bite others, maybe not with as much love. If you use it, expect that word to become your favorite. If you yell at him, he will yell at you.

6. Everyone wants to do their best.

A two-year-old usually tries to be on their best behavior until exhausted and collapses. Tired self-control muscles are sore and just don’t respond to “Sit still,” “Wait to use the bathroom,” and “Whisper!” orders imposed by adults on young children. Was he better yesterday? Excellent. Today he needs more help not to hurt feelings. Assume that he is doing the best he can and stop criticizing him. Praise him for even trying.

7. Did you forget to provide him with enough…?

The child communicates with you constantly without words. A cold, a missed nap, pangs of hunger, embarrassment, and nagging from parents strain the self-control muscle beyond its ability to respond correctly. Take the time to bring age-appropriate organic food packed with nutrients, fish oils, and trace elements, water, diapers, a sweater, and toys to help keep you comfortable instead of miserable and speechless, unable to ask for what you need. You must listen with your ears and eyes to what is going on inside. A calm and happy child means a lot less work and stress for you.

8. What is the problem?

Few adult occasions are so important that a parent should ignore a child’s need to stop and emotionally rest. Anyone who has ever been a parent will excuse him if he needs to take a cranky kid outside for a few minutes and everyone else will figure it out one day. Put your child before other people. That’s your job.

9. Become more sensitive.

Most good parents can instinctively sense their children’s emotional levels as a result of stressful events, both positive like parties, and negative like a skittish dog. Some inexperienced or less sensitive parents may miss important signs that a mental muscle is getting tired. When your toddler approaches his limit, he needs to pay attention. If you notice stress in your child and act quickly, you can often prevent a total meltdown.

10. Grandma is right.

Wise older parents and grandparents seem to rescue and spoil young children, but wisely allow the child a moment’s respite and regress to less stringent behavioral demands. Knowing how to help your toddler succeed is a win for everyone, especially the innocent people sitting at the next table. Most spoiled children grow up to be doting parents. Overdisciplined children grow up to be neurotic and skittish adults.

11. Learning has its ups and downs.

Just because a child is potty-trained at home on quiet afternoons doesn’t mean he can get through the excitement of a church picnic without an accident. The child is not wrong, the expectations and demands of the parents are wrong. If your toddler misbehaves, he acts inappropriately or backs down, then try to imagine that his underdeveloped mental muscles have been worked to the point of failure. Lower your expectations… even lower.

12. REPAIR

Learn how to REPAIR your child’s mental muscle of self-discipline. Gently take him to a quiet place to rest, pick him up in your arms, protect him from further stimulation, smile and give him affection, speak slowly in a pleasant voice with information that helps him know that you still love him and that he is okay. , then a little massage while you hug. Let the busy world go on without you two for a while. Rock slowly with your head on your shoulder as your child’s body processes millions of bits of new information that allow their nerve endings to relax and recover. Only then can you reasonably demand more from someone who gives the best of his ability and with all that a little heart muscle can do.

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