One mistake I see time and time again is that of people compromising their values. Sometimes we can ignore one of our values simply to please our lover. This is not OK. Relationships are built on trust, acceptance, appreciation, love, and honesty. You simply cannot allow yourself to be anything other than who you really are in a relationship. Being honest with yourself first is very important. There are many people who are not being honest, faking relationship after relationship and wondering why they leave a series of bad relationships wherever they go.
Committing to being genuine and true to your values is the key here. Don’t let your lover compromise your values. Values are certain principles by which we live. We may have learned these values as children or developed some of our values as we grew up. We raise our children according to our values. That is why it is equally important to stick with ours. It may have a value that does not approve of sex before marriage. The love of your life shows up and he or she may insist that your worth is not important to them, therefore it shouldn’t be to you. Wrong. Your values are extremely important and it is very important to stay true to them. If you believe that couples should abstain from sexual intimacy until they are married, it is important to stick with it. If you give in and let your partner get away with it, you will regret it. I made this mistake and I still regret it to this day.
Relationships are based on accepting the values of others. You should not even try to convince someone that your value is wrong. There is nothing wrong with expressing your values to your partner, but convincing them to change theirs when they disagree with you is not okay. Committing to your most important values will cause you to lose in two ways. Your relationship will not survive due to resentment and you will feel full of regret for having given up on your values.
Copyright © 2007 Janelle Coulton
