The term attachment parenting was originally coined by pediatrician William Sears and is a way of life these days for many parents, some of whom don’t even realize they’re doing it! There are entire communities both online and in ‘real life’ that are dedicated to parenting. So what is this form of parenting and is it for you?
Attachment parenting loosely translates to sensitive and emotional parenting, where parents and caregivers respond to the needs of the child in a way that is said to foster healthy social and emotional development. For example, many attached parents can practice co-sleeping for as long as their child benefits from it, which in some cases can be several years. The belief is that by allowing the child to fall asleep peacefully next to the parents, the child learns to grow in confidence to the point that she can finally sleep independently, because no one has asked her to do this before she is ready. . The ultimate goal of attachment parenting is to promote a healthy attachment between parent and child, and let’s face it, most parents want this strong, secure bond anyway.
During the first weeks of a baby’s life, attachment parenting requires parents to keep their baby close as much as they can and as often as they can. Baby slings and slings are perfect for this and help further strengthen the bond. Holding your baby also means you become more adept at your baby’s moods, wants, needs and emotions, mainly due to closeness.
Attachment parenting doesn’t believe in letting a baby cry; this goes against the concept. By responding to his bay immediately, it is believed that you are instilling in your son the confidence he needs to gain independence. Breastfeeding is also very common for parents who follow the attachment parenting model. Of course, this is not always possible for all mothers and that’s okay.
Finally, attachment parenting, contrary to popular belief, requires discipline. The commonly used term is ‘gentle discipline’, which means that parents need to understand their child’s behavior in order to deal with it appropriately. For example, babies like to put things in their mouths; this is a big part of the ways they learn about texture and taste. It would be unrealistic to remove all objects from a baby’s reach 24 hours a day, so attachment parenting requires that parents simply educate their children on what things can and cannot be tried. The same goes for rude behavior. A baby who likes to pull the hair should be gently told no and then shown how to play nice.
Many parents will find that they are already applying many of the principles of attachment parenting. William Sears has written many interesting books on this subject, and his theories may already be common practice in his home. The most important fact to remember is that, as a parent, it’s vital to follow your child’s instincts. The rest will hopefully follow naturally.
