“I could kill myself.”
Maybe you have said it. Honestly, I bet I’ve said it. In so many variations.
I will not work that now.
However, I will say that words matter. It doesn’t matter if you’re saying “purple is the most amazing color” or “purple is the ugliest color ever” or “does the San Andreas fault make me look fat?” Actions matter. Words matter. The meaning matters. Perception matters.
One of the most insightful/worst things I’ve learned through my Interpersonal Communication courses is this: meaning is in the mind of the receiver.
Make sure I’m not asking you to be too sensitive to the PC. You can craft your message. You can be hyperconscious. However, sometimes (quite possibly most of the time) we don’t know we’ve said something shocking until we see the reactions. It is just as important to recognize them as it is to be aware of our surroundings and situations in the first place.
One of my favorite personal entertainments is taking what people say literally. Try it. Taking out the colloquial understanding of the words/sayings can completely change the meanings and give you, in context, a relatively funny picture. Keep that grain of salt close as you continue reading.
I am fascinated by the study of words and their use. I suppose that puts me in a unique position to analyze the situations/comments to come.
No more prissy words: September is Suicide Prevention Awareness Month.
After my sister took her own life in March 2013, it took quite a while to readjust to our culturally personalized patterns. Hell, there was even a new puzzle-type app released where you died if you didn’t solve things correctly. Imagine me, recently separated from my main self (is it a mini-me counterpart?), watching a friend play a game and saying over and over, “See? I died… I died… I died. “. … I died again.” It was completely innocent and, to me at the time, completely horrible.
Suicide has a long history of disgrace, shame. Perhaps that relates more to the ideal that we, in our lives and in the lives of others, can fix things. If you took your own life because you couldn’t solve a problem that I could have solved, well, that’s disturbing.
Honestly, I think it goes back to the fact that at creation God didn’t make any more gods. God created man (humans), who were less than God. He is not perfect.
WE ARE NOT EQUIPPED TO FIX ALL HORRORS, INJUSTICES, or (for God’s sake) even ANY SCRATCHES OR STAINS OR GLARE OR GLARE in this or ANY world.
That sucks. I want to fix it. I want to do better.
You know what makes it stink less? Trying to remember that God did not make more Gods in creation. He made us human. Wandering. Unequipped to fight the most intimate battles that rage; in ourselves or in others. Often times, relinquishing control is much more difficult than the test itself. Our desire to be right, to be in control, to be God will never cease to amaze me.
I like to think that means we all want to make this world a better place. One way to do this is that the next time someone reacts harshly to your words, try flipping the script and seeing it from their point of view.
