It can be difficult when a relationship ends, especially if it has been long-standing or ends on bad terms. Your emotions are all over the place and it might even seem like there is no light at the end of the tunnel, if they suggested the breakup. But wait, let’s take a look at the top five ways to get over a breakup and you too can move on and be happy again with or without a partner.
Do You – The first thing you want to do is, “Do You”. In case you don’t know what that means, it’s just putting itself back together. Get a long overdue makeover (a new hair color/cut, try new makeup, maybe lash extensions), go shopping and pick out some new outfits, join a gym and start looking great again. We call this “revenge corps.” .” Yeah, so the next time you see them, they’ll be like, “Wow, you look fantastic!” No, we don’t want your attention, but we want you to know that life goes on, not to mention that you’ll feel great and look wonderful .
Simply taking some time to put your personal life into perspective will do wonders for your mind, body, and soul. Eliminate all those negative feelings and start thinking about a brighter and happier future. Remember, it all starts from the inside, so clean yourself up and get rid of all the bad clothes.
Clean House – Cleaning the house has always worked for me, and you don’t have to wait for spring to do spring cleaning. If any of your ex’s items were left in your home, get rid of them. Rearrange your furniture, change the paint color in your bedroom, redo the bathroom (changing the color scheme with towels and a few new fixtures is a cheap but great way to spruce things up). Just make a few types of changes. You’ll be amazed at how much happier you’ll be when you come home to your new and improved living space.
Dating: Sometimes while we’re in a relationship, we stop going out with our friends, don’t do hangouts, or heck, we don’t even talk to our friends that often. Well, now that the dead weight is gone, reach out to your friends, socialize and have fun. Yes, you may need to apologize for not being around, but we all know what it’s like when your partner really doesn’t want you to hang out with your single friends and we’ve all tried to please them at some point. If they are true friends, they will understand and accept your apology.
Cut ties – One of the worst things about a breakup is when your ex wants to stay friends. Even if it wasn’t a bad breakup, there’s no need to call each other and be friends. After all, if things were going this well, you wouldn’t have finished, would you? It’s best to have a final discussion to tie up loose ends and then cut ties.
If there are kids involved (who aren’t together), let them know that even though you’re breaking up, you still care about them and will still be there for them, if that’s the case. If there are family members you’ve bonded with, let them know you’re still around, but you won’t be at every family function or “hanging out” with the family. There is nothing worse than seeing your ex with his new girl. Even if you don’t want them back, deep down it’s a bit awkward, so opt out of all family functions.
That does not mean cutting the family. Sometimes we form strong ties with family members and don’t want to end them; after all, we broke up with the man/woman and not with the family. The flip side of this is that you don’t want to be showing up all the time like you’re thirsty for his attention. I mean, attend things like birthday parties or potlucks, but avoid the more intimate gatherings like Christmas and Thanksgiving.
Starting over: One of the worst things we can do after a breakup is hold on to the negatives and use them to keep someone new from getting too close. First, never judge the next person by the actions of the last person, it’s not cool. Second, take your time getting back on dates, ask questions, and listen to what the person is talking about. Sometimes if we just listen we can learn a lot about a person, even things they don’t want us to know seem to slip away if it’s not the right person.
Lastly, if you meet someone, there is no need to rush into anything. Whether your last relationship ended peacefully or you had to get a restraining order to keep them away, don’t judge others based on their previous experiences. Take your time and never let anyone coerce you or make you feel guilty for not moving faster than you are. If a person is not willing to take it easy, he is not the person for you.
You may have to go to several bad apples before you find the right one, or you may be happy alone, but trust and believe, the ball is in your court and you call the shots. Using the top five ways to get over a breakup will decrease angst and ease tension and make dating fun and not stressful.
